What behaviors matter and how to spot them

There is a lot of reasons why people cheat, according to the sex therapist Tammy Nelson, Ph.D. “A person can cheat because they love who they are when they are with their partner. They can feel sexier, smarter, more charming and more alive when they cheat. With her spouse at home, she can feel sexier, smarter, more charming and more alive when she cheats. feel invisible, dull., boring or old, ”she wrote to mbg.

Zimmerman says this more subtle form of cheating often starts by accident. “What starts off as a working dinner, a message from an old friend or flame, or a shared workout at the gym can turn into flirtation and an intimate affair,” she writes. “A lot of people have these interactions without it turning into cheating. Others, especially those who are not fully developed in their own relationships, begin to indulge in feelings of validation, attraction and excitement. “

Micro-cheating can be caused by a momentary lack of judgment, but it could also be a sign that the relationship is not right for you. “Some businesses are what I call ‘can openers’ – a way of ending your partnership even when you didn’t know you wanted to go out,” Nelson says. “It’s an unconscious way of waking up to the fact that it’s really over.”

That said, a relationship isn’t necessarily over if there’s been micro-cheating in the past. “If both people are willing to discover their own contribution to the problems of [relationship], if they are ready to learn to take responsibility, they can create a much better relationship than before, “psychologist Margaret Paul, Ph.D., previously told mbg.

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